Marriage Equality Is A Simple Thing.

I am about to press a button for many. There are many things that I am very passionate about. One of those many things is marriage equality.  I of course am all for it! Who am I to tell someone that they can’t have the same happiness and share their life with the one they love because it makes me uncomfortable? NO ONE. That’s who. Someone else’s marriage and happiness is none of my business. Now, I am going to refute a few reasons why some people are against marriage equality in a moment. First, let me go over my legal marriage as seen in my (not so) great state of Arkansas.

When my husband and I decided to marry each other 7 years ago, we noticed some things on our marriage license we didn't really think about.

1.       It’s a legal document. We had to literally sign a contract between ourselves and the State that

a.       We are not married to anyone else at the time of signing the marriage license, and

b.      We were of sound mind and body when signing the license

2.       It doesn't mention God or a God like deity of any sort anywhere…ever. In fact, a judge married us in a park.

There are so many reasons people decide to marry, it’s impossible to count. There are some that we (“normal” straight people) take for granted.

1.       Death Benefits. No one wants to think about it, but when your loved one passes on, the last thing you want to think about is how to make ends meet. Married couples that have Death Benefits, don’t have to think twice about it.

2.       Hospital visits. Could you imagine being told by your loved one’s family to get out and not be able to support your loved one all because the family doesn’t like your lifestyle? No? Must be nice. There are couples that have been together for years, decades even, that deal with that once one gets sick.

3.       Home ownership. Makes buying and selling a house much easier.

4.       Insurance. Being insured on your spouse’s insurance saves so much money.

5.       Tax incentives. These are just a few

a.       Filing taxes can take less time and expense

b.      Jobless spouse can have an IRA

c.       A married couple can receive greater charitable contribution deductions

Now, there are some people that feel differently than I do on the issue of marriage equality. I personally feel it is not about who can marry who, but a modern civil rights issue. As recently as 47 years ago it was FEDERALLY ILLEGAL for my husband and me to be married and reproduce because our races are different. He is Caucasian, I am African American. I know what you’re thinking…”What?!” “Why?” “How DARE they tell someone they can’t marry another person because of the color of their skin!” “RUDE!” And, you’re right. It was wrong. It is wrong. It was wrong for people to be denied happiness with their loved one because they are different. It was wrong then, it’s wrong now. We have states that are denying some of their citizens rights because they are different. I think they may have forgotten this tiny little thing called The Constitution of the United States. You see, we have a little Amendment. We’ll call it, The 14^th Amendment for fun and it states: “All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or

immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.” Hmmmm….Now, I’m no lawyer, yet, but to me, it sounds like the Federal Government pretty much just said, “Hey States, don’t be douches. All your citizens deserve to be treated equally. What you provide for one, provide for all. We did this once already, you lost. You don’t get to pick and choose who eats where, who gets to enjoy some privileges, who gets protection, and who gets to sign legal documents…”

Back to the assholes thoughtful people that have a list as to why they are against marriage equality. I am going to refute each and every one of their reasons, which you can find here.

1.       It IS Marriage. Did they sign a marriage license? Is it issued by a government office? It’s marriage

2.       It does not violate natural law. There are many animals (Which is what man is after all) that have homosexual members.  Here is a list of some just off the top of my head:

a.       Rams

b.      Laysan Albatross

c.       Dolphins

d.      Bonobos

e.      Cock of the Rock

f.        African Lions

g.       Penguins

h.      Giraffes

3.       It does not always deny a child a Mother or a Father. First of all, there are so many single parents in this country alone, I can’t count them. Just because they have two Moms or two Dads, doesn’t mean they are doing harm to the child. There are straight couples that are so harmful to their children, the State has to remove them permanently from their parent’s care. Who is to say in the case of a homosexual couple that, let’s say they have a surrogate that used her own egg, or a sperm donor, doesn’t allow the donor to keep in touch with the child. Or heaven forbid they have other members of their circle that is like family to be a strong Mother or Father figure in the child’s life.

4.       It validates and promotes the homosexual lifestyle. This argument I agree on. Not for the reason you think, but because the “Homosexual Lifestyle” is a normal lifestyle that someone lives and it doesn’t need to be seen as wrong or different than the “Heterosexual Lifestyle”

5.       It turns a Civil Rights issue into a Moral issue. If you don’t like homosexuality, that’s fine. Don’t have homosexual relationships. Being gay is no different than your race, your natural eye color, your natural hair color, or your body shape. You are born being you. Love you. No one has the right to tell another person that because they are who they are, they don’t deserve the same rights and privileges that someone else has because they don’t like that person. That’s called discrimination and we have laws against that.

6.       Families are created all the time. If we were worried about sterile unions, the infertile, *Hi there! Secondary infertility here!* the elderly, and the sterile heterosexuals wouldn’t be able to marry. I am so glad science is on our side for this one. Marriage is not about reproduction. Which, if that is what a couple chooses to do, great, if not, also great! Marriage is about spending your life with the person you love and having that love being recognized by the State.

7.       It does not defeat the States purpose of benefiting marriage.  Homosexual couples still have normal, loving, caring, and moral atmospheres.

8.       It does impose its acceptance to all society. Why shouldn’t it. The State issues marriages to Heterosexual couples all the time and then turns around and issues annulments and divorces to those same couples very quickly. Did you know that about 2% of Homosexual couples divorce as opposed to nearly 50% of Heterosexual couples….makes you think.

9.       It is NOT the cutting edge to sexual revolution. Homosexuality has been around since the beginning of man.

10.   The Christian God or any other that I can find doesn’t care who falls in love with who. Now, if we go by the Christian God, we will learn that His followers are taught that God made everyone. Man is made in his image. If we are made in his image, God’s a little gay too. I don’t see a deity saying “I love you all…except you because you’re gay. Never mind that I made you that way.” It just doesn’t work that way.

So, as you can see, I am all about marriage equality. If you aren’t for it, it’s ok. Just don’t try to cover it with bullshit reasons. Own up to it and say you’re an asshole. It’s cool. But, keep in mind, one day this won’t even be an issue. In 47 years, our Grandchildren will look at this issue and wonder what we were thinking for even having to have this conversation. Homosexuals are people too. They deserve happiness just as much as the next person. Homosexuality is just the tip of the LGBT community. Everyone deserves to be happy. Everyone deserves to marry who they want and for that marriage to be recognized. 

Getting my sexy back!!

Recently The Husband and I decided that we are going to work on ourselves to make ourselves happy. He is going back to school and I am working on getting healthy. I have been going to the gym regularly since February. I found out in January that my cholesterol was less than ideal. I refuse to die young because of something as easily (ha!) done as changing my lifestyle. Now working out is fun for me, I am still working on the eating healthier bit, but I have gotten better. I eat more appropriate portions, I try to eat several times a day, and I drink lots and lots of water.

The other day, a few friends and I decided to start a 30 day challenge with crunches, planks, and the root of all that is evil, squats. I have already started losing some inches, but I have found that some of the skin from 6 pregnancies, lots of bacon, and cake has not been kind to me. It needs some help in toning up. So, here comes the challenge! We are starting on June 1. I will do another post with before and after pics and measurements. The one thing I will leave out will be the number on the scale. Mostly because it doesn't matter. I will be building muscle and that weighs more than fat so even if I were to watch the numbers on the scale, they would most likely go up.

All of my readers are welcome to join! Please keep in mind, this is in no way replacing my gym regiment at all. I will still go to the gym and use the tools there as well as this challenge.

Now that we have the tools we will need to make this challenge effective, I hope we all kick this challenges ass!! I'm ready to get my sexy back, y'all!!

Bad Bitch Polish

So, everyone likes to be a little girly at times. I am no different. I love getting my nails done. Now I can do all the awesome girly stuff with my nails at home!

Image used from Bad Bitch Polish site. "Master of Ceremonies"

Bad Bitch Polishes are all hand mixed, 3 free (Which means: Dibutyl Phthalate (DBD), Formaldehyde, and Toluene free), and many are vegan. They are all made here in the great U.S. of A as well! 

 Please feel free to "Like" their Facebook and take a look of the full Esty Shop to view all of their awesome inventory!

Master or Ceremonies

Now, to the good stuff!

I tried "Master of Ceremonies" for a week. Let me tell y'all, it is awesome!! I love the color. In fact, everyone else loves the color as well. I couldn't keep The Munchkin from asking me to paint her nails every day! 

I have had this polish on for a week and it's only chipped, just barely at that, once. I've been doing all sorts of rough Mommy stuff, working, peeling tape off of things, banging my hands on walls, and doing my hair. This stuff stands tough! 

The application process was super easy. I didn't have any issues with clumping or uneven application. I may have also cheated and
used "The Bitch's" own  tips when applying her product.

With a Base Coat

I have to say, I am in love with Bad Bitch Polish. I will be stocking up on her products and very soon. You can as well! 

After selecting your awesome color(s) of choice, before you check out, use the code SURVIVINGLIFE to get 10% off of your entire purchase! Bad Bitch Polish is also trying to help us #PayItForward and #HelpConnieJo. In addition to the 10% off, she is donating $1 for every bottle sold from now until December 15th when you enter the same code.

         

Paying It Forward

ConnieJo is a sweet, sweet soul that has fallen on hard times. She is about to lose her home after years of trying to get her life back together. Here's her story, as told by a close friend: Connie is a disabled senior suffering from Lupus, related severe arthritis, circulatory issues, and is also diagnosed 70% deaf. Additionally, she suffers from permanent damage as a result of injuries that occurred during her former abusive marriage. She lives independently with her two 'therapy dogs', Dakota and Cochise, whom she loves dearly and considers her family. Her dogs provide her with emotional companionship, security, and are her 'ears', hearing such things as the doorbell, since she is unable to hear it herself. Prior to becoming disabled a few years ago, Connie was known to be a dedicated hard worker her entire life. She is a very compassionate, kind, caring and giving person. Throughout life she has often sacrificed her own needs for sake of helping family, many friends, and even strangers in need. She was the sole caregiver for her father when he was terminally ill, and cared for her younger brother when he was ill with kidney disease. Prior to his death in 2008, Connie offered to donate one of her kidney's to help her brother, but doctors determined he was not medically eligible for a transplant. She is also an animal lover, and has adopted countless neglected homeless dogs over the years, including 10 year old Dakota and 2 year old Cochise. In early 2009, a traumatic life transition began for Connie. Pshychologically broken, battered, and sick, Connie divorced her spouse after suffering a lengthy history of physical, pychological and financial abuse. The abuses by her former spouse continued after her divorce. She was advised by trauma doctors and legal professionals, to relocate to protect her physical and emotional well being. In late 2010, Connie courageously left behind the place she had known as home for almost 40 years. Along with her two beloved dogs, Connie relocated to Kansas City and began rebuilding a new life free of abuse, torment, and fear. Her former husband destroyed all financial security, so Connie sold a majority of her personal belongings and property to raise enough money so that she could afford to buy an inexpensive, modest, 2 bedroom home in Kansas City that is handicap and wheelchair accessible in a safe senior community. Despite disabling and painful physical challenges, for the past 3 years Connie has been slowly cleaning up the once run down house. She has proudly accomplished transforming a house in to a safe, peaceful, and comfortable 'home sweet home' for herself, Dakota, and Cochise. Connie's only personal source of income is her retirement/disability, which is a fixed income of less than $800.00 monthly. She is unable to supplement her income due to multiple disabilities and healthcare restrictions. Her former husband was court ordered to pay $600.00 monthly into a trust fund for Connie but he has not done so in violation of court orders. Her property taxes and insurance were to be paid from this special needs trust fund. Despite her financial limitations, Connie has frugally managed to pay her home's insurance premiums and for necessary basic home maintenance repairs, but she has not been able to pay her property taxes the past 3 years. She and her two beloved dogs, Dakota and Cochise, face the uncertainty of being homeless as of January 1st, 2014 if the past due property taxes on her home are not paid in full. The state of Missouri appears to have no resources or feasible programs available to help. Jackson County, Missouri has added almost $2,000.00 in penalties and interest on her past due taxes. The county has stated they will continue to charge interest on the unpaid taxes. Due to her fixed income and disabilities, she is unable to obtain a loan to pay her property taxes. She has no family financially able to help her, and all other efforts made to pay the past due taxes have been unsuccessful.

Here she is with two of her friends! 

Hoping for a Christmas miracle, we're now turning to her friends and fellow human beings asking for your help to prevent Connie, Dakota, and Cochise from losing their home. If we can raise $10,000.00, we can pay the past due property taxes, penalty, interest, and pay an additional 2 years home taxes in advance. This plan will allow Connie to live securely in her handicap accessible home another 5 years, at which time her monthly fixed income should increase. At 62 she'll be eligible for additional income through her Social Security, and should then be able to pay her home's property taxes herself. The money raised will be securely deposited in to Connie's trust fund, and the trust will directly pay her property taxes to Jackson County, Missouri. Any additional money raised over our goal of $10,000.00, will also be deposited in to Connie's trust fund to help pay future property taxes, insurances, necessary home repairs, such as if her hot water heater would need replaced, or to provide necessary veterinary care for her beloved dogs. Connie is a very proud humble person, and not the type of person who would ask others for help. Rather, she is the one always helping others, but this time she desperately needs our help, to save her safe and secure handicap accessible home from property tax foreclosure.

ConnieJo on stage with Kid Rock in Kansas City

You guys... it will NOT be that hard to save Connie's life as she knows it if we work together. I have over 150,000 fans on Facebook alone, and if each one donated LESS THAN A DOLLAR, we can give this woman everything she deserves, and more. And what a better way to pay it forward this holiday season than giving to someone who would give to any of you in a heartbeat! There are a few ways you can help: 1. Share this post EVERYWHERE. Facebook, Twitter, wherever you can think of. If you are a blogger I give you full permission to copy parts of this post to put on your own blog. Getting the word out will help more than anything. 2. You can donate via Paypal:

(Note: If this button isn't working, you can send funds via Paypal to mrsheatherreese@gmail.com) You don't have to have a Paypal account to do this. You can do this with a debit or credit card, just like any other online purchase. 3. If you'd prefer to send cash, checks, or money orders via snail mail rather than online, you can send them to:

She is one Die Hard Chiefs fan!

Help for Connie 2816 NW Kingsridge Dr. Blue Springs, MO 64015 Wal-Mart gift cards are also helpful, as her income is limited and this will help her to be able to buy the essentials so that she can save more money to put aside to save her house. We want to help this beautiful woman that has been through so much and has helped others, even when or if that help meant that she went without. She deserves so much and most of all, she deserves to keep the house she worked so hard to make into a home. We can further help ConnieJo by doing some or all of our Christmas shopping in this group on Facebook.
Shop Here!!
  Vendors in this group are donating some or all of their proceeds from these transactions to ConnieJo!

Flynn's Birth Story September 29, 2013

Hi Guys!
As some of y'all know, I was recently knocked the hell up. Well, this weekend, we finally had the baby. I have to be honest with you, it was everything I could have ever imagined! It was my best birth experience ever and I wouldn't change a thing about it...except for maybe how LONG I labored!

Thursday afternoon I started having regular contractions that were 4-5 minutes apart. They were not too strong, but I felt comfortable enough having the husband stay home from work and calling in myself since I've always only labored for 9 hours max. Well, we labored through Thursday night and Friday. Finally, Friday, they were starting to get painful.

A family friend came over. She was present for all of the births of the other 3 kids. Well, almost. She just missed The Boogie Bear's birth, but she was there through the labor. We labored all day Friday. The Gay Husband was even with me and we went out and bought cloth diapers, walked our local downtown square, and walked my neighborhood to work Flynn down into the birth canal because Flynn was so high. I was even streaming some of my labor to some of my online friends so that could still be a part of the birth with us. Nothing happened on Friday and I was just exhausted. So we decided to get some rest. Everyone went home. Saturday came and gone and contractions were only a few per hour. Which was fine with me because my body was just exhausted. The Husband even went to work that night. Saturday night the kids and I go to The Bestie's house and have dinner with her and her family.  After eating an awesome meal and getting 8 hours of solid "Dead to the World" sleep, I awakened Sunday to my water breaking. I woke up The Husband, who had only been asleep for about an hour at that point, to help me to the bathroom so I wouldn't make more of a mess. I cleaned myself up, checked out the fluid to make sure it was clear and odorless, which it was, and got comfortable on the couch. I told The husband to go back to sleep, it would still be a while since the contractions hadn't picked back up. All day long, my contractions were about 10 minutes apart and mild. While I was contracting, and playing with the kids, a friend of mine who was 2 weeks ahead of me (She was 40 weeks and some change into her pregnancy) had her baby that morning. So my online friends and I were basking in the new baby. The contractions were starting to get stronger and I could feel them in my lower belly all the way into my cervix. Still hurt, but just annoying, nothing was screaming "Get Ready!!" yet.

The Husband was scheduled to work that night and he kept asking me if he needed to call in. I was being stubborn and told him to go ahead and go in. I realized that I wasn't in the mood to cook dinner for the kids, so I ordered them pizza to be delivered at 6:15 p.m. The Husband was scheduled in at 5. So he leaves and I realize that the contractions are stronger and more painful! Thankfully, ten minutes after he arrived at work, he decided to call and check on me. I told him to get home within the hour. He was home 20 minutes later. By the time he called me at 5:10 and he was home at 5:30, I had but The Boogie Bear in her play pen in the front room, told The Boy he was in charge of his sisters, put the tv on Netflix for the Kids, and got my ass in the bathtub. Every few minutes, The Boy would check on me while I was in the tub because I sounded like a cow being murdered. After reassuring him I was ok, he would go back in the front room with his sisters. The Husband FINALLY got home at 5:30. He walked into the bathroom and asked me what I needed. I told him to get the birthing pool set up. As he left to do that, I had a giant contraction that just slapped me in the face. I literally SCREAMED for my husband. The Boy runs into the bathroom and asks what's wrong.

 Me: "Where's your dad?" 

The Boy: "He left"

Me: "HE LEFT?!!!"

The Boy: "Yup" 

The Boy goes back in front room with his sisters. A few minutes later, The Husband comes in.

The Husband: "Did he tell you I left?"

Me: "Yes! Where were you?!"

The Husband: "Airing up the pool"

Me: "Don't do that shit again!"

After clearing that up, The Husband finishes with the pool and somewhere in there, the pizza is delivered around 6:10. The Husband gets me out of the tub and walks me to the pool. As we are walking from the bathroom to the pool, through The Boy's room, I feel the urge to push and I start to squat. The Husband won't let me. He keeps telling me I have to make it to the pool. So I get my shit together and make it to the pool. I sit so I can catch my breathe. I rest for about 10 minutes and close my eyes. But I realize I am sweating like a whore in church and ask The Husband to spray cool water from the hose on me, so he does. It felt awesome!! While I'm in my temporary normal state of mind, I tell The Husband to start streaming the birth for my friends online. After that, shit got real!

I had a killer contraction where all I could do was the loud "MMMMOOOOOOAAAAHHHHHH!!!!"  over and over again until it passed. I took a chance and checked myself and Flynn's head was right there! With the next contraction, I got on all fours to push, but my butt wasn't in the water. The Husband kept reminding me to get all the way in the water. He even guided my rear end to the squatting position for me. With the next contraction, Flynn's head was born and the contraction after that, Flynn was completely born! I was so happy and excited that I completely forgot to check the gender! Flynn is a boy!! 

The Boy cut his brother's cord about ten minutes after it stopped pulsating. All three kids were instantly in awe of their new baby brother.

 It was an intense and beautiful birth and I wouldn't change it. Flynn shares a birthday with his Auntie on his father's side and with my online friend's son. 

I love that we not only did a home water birth, but it was unassisted. We were at home the whole time. We weren't on a clock, and we were able to do what was most comfortable for us without fear of inconveniencing someone else. Flynn was born on September 29, 2013 at 6:28 p.m. 6 lbs 7.3 oz and 19 3/4 in long. Very healthy and very happy! 

Stop peeing on the toilet!

Being pregnant, I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. I have to pee every 30 minutes or so.  I have noticed that men and women seem to have very different private bathroom habits. Oh, let me count the ways…

1.       In private or public, men seem to have an issue with peeing IN the toilet. No guys, getting close doesn't count. It’s a pain in the ass when you’re as big as a house and have to pee like a race horse only to pause to clean up someone else’s urine off the seat before sitting, or placing the protective paper on the seat to pee. I’ll tell you like I tell my son. If you feel or know you can’t hit the target when peeing, sit your ass down.  Women, never have that problem. We HAVE to sit, or at least hover to pee so we always hit the target. No muss, no fuss.

2.       This week alone, I have replaced our toilet paper roll 3 times. Every time we run out toilet paper, I replace the roll. The menfolk however, have not mastered this art form yet. Instead, I will find it behind the toilet, sitting on top of the old roll that still on the dispenser, or on the floor next to the toilet…*sigh* Y’all, we women have to wipe EVERY TIME we use the restroom, whether we pee or poop. It’s not hard to replace the roll after you use half of one to wipe your ass. Here's an instructional clip to show you how it's done in case you aren't sure.

3.       Most of us shave. Some shave our bodies (Legs, underarms, crotches, etc) and some shave our faces. If we women can’t get away with leaving our body hair in the bathtub when we shave, men shouldn't

get away with leaving their face hair in the sink when they shave. It sucks going to wash your hands to find that it won’t drain because half of Sasquatch’s hair is in the sink.

4.       I get yelled at all the time because, “I spend too much time showering.” I take the time to get wet, wash my entire body, rinse, do my face, and if I have to, wash my hair. The Husband…jumps in, washes armpits, crotch and ass, and feet, rinses, jumps out. I don’t know if this is all men, but damn! I couldn't take a 5 minute shower if my life depended on it!

5.       I've noticed a lot of toothpaste on my mirror. I couldn't figure out why since both my husband and I are pretty good about not spewing toothpaste while brushing. This morning I noticed where it was coming from. I was watching my son and eldest daughter brush and noticed that The Boy will hold his mouth open and splash while The Munchkin hovers over the sink (Probably due to the fact that she can’t reach the mirror yet). I’m not sure if this is a men V. women habit or a child V. adult habit. Either way, The Boy is the cause for my messy mirrors. 

My Precious

Are you a fan of The Lord of The Rings? Did you ever wonder how a hobbit came to possess The One Ring? Well, here's your chance to win that story on BlueRay!!!

J.R.R. Tolkien’s epic adventure follows the journey of Bilbo Baggins, who is swept into an amazing quest to reclaim the lost Dwarf Kingdom of Erebor from the fearsome dragon Smaug. Approached out of the blue by the wizard Gandalf the Grey, Bilbo findshimself joining a company of thirteen dwarves led by the legendary warrior, Thorin Oakenshield. Their journey will take them into the Wild; through treacherous lands swarming with Goblins and Orcs, deadly Wargs and Sorcerers. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey is coming to Blu-ray & DVD March 19th 2013!
Enter to win The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Blu-Ray/DVD/Ultraviolet Digital Content Combo Pack! (You don't have to have a Blu-Ray player, it comes with a regular DVD.) The giveaway will end on March 30th. It's hosted by My Husband Ate All My Ice Cream and Warner Bros.  

Entry-Form

I was not compensated in any way for this giveaway. This blog is not responsible for prize shipment. See the giveaway form for complete terms and conditions.

I Gotta Get Off My Ass Now...

A lot has changed in my house in the last few months. The Sister has gone back to the Hell that is Houston, The Boogie Bear has started walking AND is now up to 4 teeth total! The Boy is in Boy Scouts, The Munchkin is demanding to go to school with her brother and the Husband is still working non-stop.

It took a while for our house to get back to normal once The Sister left, but we are finally a family unit once more. Now, that we are back to normal...or at least as normal as we can be, I felt it was time to work on me! So, a few girlfriends and I have started a weight loss challenge! We are all happy with our curves...cause you know, gotta have curves. We just want to be healthier. We figure if losing a few pounds will get us that, then by all means, let's drop those bitches!! Our fitness challenge is a bit different than most. We aren't just going off of weight loss. We are going off of body percentage lost.

The Husband is also working on changing something about him for the better...he is quitting smoking! For reals this time, not for play play. We get to be cranky together!! Him from not getting a cigarette, me from not getting the deliciousness that is bacon on a regular basis.

Ultimately, we will both be healthier for ourselves and for our family. We worked too hard to have a family, don't want to leave them unnecessarily early.

Now for the hard part. Actually getting off my ass and working out! I'm a broke bitch so a gym membership is out of the question. I do however have a mean ass Wii Fit Board. Thankfully, my baby girls love going to the park with Mommy, so walking the trails with them won't be an issue. My issue comes from this...I have something that is called PCOS * if you deal with infertility, you know what it is, or have at least heard of it before * It stands for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. My hormones are out of whack and my body doesn't like to ovulate on it's own...simplified definition. But, because of my hormones being out of whack, I have to literally work 3 times harder than the average woman to lose weight. The challenge is going to be fun, but will be a lot of work and I see some frustration as well. 70 pounds is lot of weight to lose!! Here's hoping it all melts off like butter! MMMMMM.....Butter

*shrugs*

So what is it about me that gets people revved up? It's not my calm demeanor under stress, it's not my pretty face or that piece of shit truck I drive. I bet I know...It's the fact that I don't keep my mouth shut. I am not a submissive personality, so if I am unhappy with something, I let you know about it. My sister has the same personality, which I am so happy she does. She unfortunately doesn't know how to convey her dislike of something or someone appropriately. She figures just interrupting people and having an attitude will get her far...which has not.

I have been told that I have some anger toward her, which is true. I hate that she is spoiled rotten and can't shut up long enough to learn something. Here are a few things she should keep in mind if she wishes to survive the next few years...

1. My house, my rules...end of discussion.
2. Just because you don't agree with how I am raising you, doesn't mean jack shit. You don't agree with it because you don't have free reign like you did before.
3. When I'm talking, you don't. I will give you the same courtesy.
4. You are not grown. You don't know what goes on in my marriage or what we talk about...don't pretend you do.
5. You want to feel like you are apart of our family? Stop acting like a little shit and participate in family things. Just because we don't discuss financial with you doesn't mean we don't consider you a part of the family. We opened our home and our hearts to have you up here. Show some fucking gratitude.
6. WEAR AGE APPROPRIATE CLOTHING!!! You are 16. When you are 18 then you can dress like a tramp.
7. If we are discussing you, you don't, I repeat...DO NOT need to know about it until we decide that you do. If you don't like...tough shit.
8. Grades are number 1. If you can't care enough about your education, you will not get far, especially in the field you want to be in.
9. Watch your fucking language when you are talking to me. I will go old school and wash your mouth out with soap!
10. If you don't want to hear what I have to say about something, don't ask the question.

These are just the tip of the ice burg. You may think it's a bit harsh...I don't care. This girl has tugged my chain for the last time. The foot is down and booted up. It will go straight up someone's ass the next time I am tested. And please, don't think it's just her. I have a whole list for the husband as well...he is just as bad as she is. I can not do shit with the sister without the husband sticking up for her. I'm too hard on her. Of course this is someone who chose to give his parents hell just because he could. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, but God Damn it...

1. Learn to provide a united front... I can't tell her one thing and then you go and say “I disagree” in front of her. You don't do it with our kids, don't do it with her.
2. Stop taking up for her all the fucking time. She is 16, she doesn't know everything. I don't either, but I sure as hell know a shit ton more than her. Unlike you, I have been a 16 year old girl and KNOW what the fuck she is planning on doing and what she is thinking.
3. If you refuse to do your part, don't do shit. Don't give input, don't offer advice, nothing.

Of course I have already discussed all these things with both of them, but I thought it would be nice for them to have a reference for when they fuck up again.  

They Just Don't Stop!

My kids eat so damn much. It's amazing that I can spend 70 bucks at the grocery store and within the hour it's all gone. I buy enough food for at least 3 days worth of meals, but do they consider that? Of course not.

I can't wait for my kids to go to college and have to provide for themselves. Maybe then, I'll get a few dollars to pay for when they come home to raid my fridge. You know what else? My kids are filthy. Not filthy as in they don't bathe, but in the fact that they can't seem to eat without spilling half of it on themselves. If they go outside, there is a 99.98% chance that grass stains will be involved. I can't tell you how much laundry I do in a week. I am constantly cooking and washing something. I'm that Mom that puts her perfectly clean child in the back seat, drives to destination, goes to take out child, and child is magically covered in chocolate or crumbs that I did not give them.

The husband is just as bad as the kids. He eats like a 15 year old line backer, but then gets heart burn and acid reflux like a 65 year old man. I'm constantly finding grease, food, soda, random stains from God only knows what on his clothes. Gotta love him though. He's only covered in grease from fixing the 115 things that are wrong with my car. He's covered in food from eating my awesome cooking, but the other stuff...all on him. I tell you what though, one of these days very soon...as in next week, most likely on my birthday'...I'm gonna eat all day, dirty up the house, and have someone clean up after me all day. I. Can't. Wait..

That Awkward moment...

...When you sit down to write and all of a sudden, there's nothing there. You draw a blank. You can't think of a single thing to write. It's writer's block and it's a bitch!

Ten minutes ago, I had all sorts of ideas running through my head. Funny ideas, too. Now, I have nothing. Maybe it's Mommy's Brain, brain farts, or the lack of sleep. There's no telling. I was sitting in front of my computer screen hoping something would come out of my fingertips...anything. So after a minute I decided to try something else. I would go about my day and see what happens. So..

1. Change baby
2. Feed baby
3. Yell at The Boy for annoying The Munchkin
4. Wonder if 11 A.M is too early for a mojito, then decide it is and plan on having one when the kids go to bed
5. Poke around in fridge
6. Feed baby again
7. Wake up The Sister
8. Curse at the computer for not giving me ideas
9. Paint my nails
10. Paint the girls' nails
11. Paint the sleeping husband's nails and giggle
12. Decide to take a friend's advice and write about writer's block

It's not fair to have all this awesomeness and not know what to write about. Hopefully, this will be my last writer's block for a while. It sucks. Now, off I go to feed the kids...again. ~New Topic!!~

It Hurts

 I know you all like to laugh, but today is a serious post for me. I don't know if y'all know, but I suffer from depression. I've had it from the time I was a teenager, but never dealt with it until my early twenties when I had to. Before my husband and I started trying to conceive our middle child, we and my mental health providers had a month long deliberation on how well I would be able to return to “normal” after being weaned off my medications. To be honest, I was so happy to be off of them. I felt like a walking zombie. I was more docile, but I wasn't myself. Even my husband could tell I wasn't myself. We just never found the right balance of medications.

Now instead of medicating with pharmaceuticals, I just try to watch my diet and keep a close eye on my emotions. They do run really high every once in a while, and then they get so low. The past week or so has been a low week. A lot of people think that depression is just made up. It's not just that one is really sad. Sadness can be just a part of it, or nothing to do with it at all. Mine comes from anger, stress, and the process of still learning how to mentally cope with those feelings.

I can't tell you how much it hurts. It's not just a mental and emotional pain, it physically hurts! My muscles ache, my stomach is in knots, I get dizzy, nauseated, and a headache. It's almost like I'm suffering from a massive hangover after being beaten to a pulp. I don't want to get out of bed at times...of course I have to because I have 4 children to look after.

I hate when I hit these depression spells. My family doesn't get the Mom/Wife they deserve when I'm in them. I feel like such a bad parent and spouse because I have decided to forgo western medicine to help me deal with it. I just don't feel like myself when I'm on them. All my umph is gone. I wish there was a more mainstream holistic way to help deal with it. I have so much more than just myself I have to worry about when I take something. Everything I ingest, I worry about how it will effect my baby and my milk supply.

I am hoping that one day balancing out our brain chemistry will be much easier than it is now. And it won't take 15 different medications to do so. What I would love to happen would be if more people understood just how much of a pain in the ass depression is. How painful it is. How much it just breaks a person or family down. I wish it could be as easy to walk into a psychologist or psychiatrists office and ask for help as it is to walk into a family physician or chiropractor's office and say “this hurts, please fix it.” Hopefully one day it will be that easy, but until then, I have to try harder to get over this pain.

If you know someone who suffers from depression and is in pain, please don't just brush them off. You'd be surprised how much a simple hug or a “Do you want to talk” will help. And it does. Depression is a real illness...just because you can't see it or even comprehend what someone has to be depressed about, don't make that person feel anymore pain by not believing them.  

Teens and Toddlers!

 Has anyone ever noticed how similar toddlers and teenagers are? You would think that once a child has hit double digits that they would be able to care for themselves and handle their emotions a bit better than their younger counterparts. You would be WRONG.

1.  When a toddler and a teenager are told no, they throw tantrums. Sure the toddler may be throwing themselves on the floor, but the teenager is a bit more subtle...My teen will slam doors, roll her eyes, smack her lips. And she'll do this for days...my toddler, will throw herself on the floor for two minutes and forget what she was mad about.
2. When in a store of any kind, both a toddler and teenager will ask non stop for anything and everything in the store. When told no, they will refer to similarity #1.
3. Anytime you hold a conversation with a toddler or a teenager, someone ends up yelling in your ear. The toddler is yelling because they find it funny as hell to see Mommy squirm from the sound of their high pitched voice and the teenager's iPod is turned up so high, they can't hear themselves think let alone how loud they are speaking to you.
4. Have you ever seen a room after a toddler or a teenager has left it? They usually make such huge messes in such a small amount of time. They are both like tornadoes!! They just whip through a room and rip everything apart!
5. It is amazing how much time a toddler and a teenager can demand. One is always telling you that they want you to see this, and watch them to that. Did you catch your toddler standing on her head? The teenagers demand you take them to the mall, drive them back and forth to their friend's houses, drive them to work, and do to those dreadful parent teacher conferences where you are informed how much your teen has become a pain in their ass.
6. I have never met someone who could eat as much as a toddler or a teenager...It's like they are both bottomless pits! I just don't have enough money to feed the football team that has possessed my toddler AND the teenager at the same time. The rest of us are starving...
7. Have you seen what happens when you let a toddler dress themselves? It's like the whole closet has thrown up all over them. Nothing matches, shoes are mismatched, tiaras are worn, and tights end up over jeans. Something similar happens when a teenager dresses themselves...only instead of the whole closet throwing up on them, they seem to find the smallest, almost non-existent clothing they can find.
8. The hair. The hair. The hair!!! OMG, The HAIR!!! That is all I have to say on that subject.
9. Driving a car with a toddler and teenager is...a challenge. Both want you to turn up their music...You're either jamming out to VeggieTales, or Lil Wayne.
10. Last but not least, neither one, toddler or teenager, listens to a word you have to say. You could tell them both to do something simple. For example, eat all your vegetables or clean your room. The only thing you will get in return is a confused look as to why you are asking them to eat healthily and to pick up after themselves. Try to tell a teenager not to do something because of blah blah blah? They do the opposite. Ever tell the toddler not to touch to stove while it's on because it's hot and they burn themselves anyway? Yup...

So it would seem that the two are one in the same. It seems to me that the only difference between a toddler and a teenager would be that one is taller than the other.  

This Is Why Men Aren't Moms...

Let me start out by saying I love my husband with all I have....but I swear on all that is Holy, I can't leave him alone to do shit!! * sigh * Let me start at the beginning of my day.

03:00 a.m.- Wake up to feed the baby

06:00 a.m.- Wake up the boy to get ready for school

07:00 a.m.- Get the boy on the bus for school

07:15 a.m.- Make sure the sister is up and getting ready for school

08:00 a.m.- Feed the munchkin and the baby

09:30 a.m.- Start laundry

12:45 p.m.- Feed the munchkin and put the munchkin down for a nap and feed the baby

01:45 p.m.- Leave husband with the children to run errands

03:00 p.m.- Go to Wal*Mart and try to muddle through without killing someone

03:20 p.m.- Pick up the sister from school and start calling husband to no avail

03:45 p.m.- Drop off sister at the orthodontist and continue calling husband while pumping in the car

04:15 p.m.- Pick up my contacts and still call the husband

04:30 p.m.- Head home and continue to call husband

I get home and find the husband sound asleep on the couch, the baby in her playpen screaming at the top of her lungs, and the munchkin was quietly sitting in her crib watching “The Backyardigans”, though she was soaked from wetting herself. The boy was standing at the edge of the baby's playpen trying to comfort her with a bottle he defrosted and bottled himself (so proud of him for that). I asked the boy how long his dad had been asleep, and he told me he was asleep when he got home from school. So at least an hour!! I left the house at 1:45!! He was awake!! So, I got the munchkin cleaned up and changed her sheets. Fed the baby and changed her, and hugged the boy. After waking the husband...violently shaking him awake, I started dinner. The husband had the balls to ask me why I was so pissed off at him...while I am chopping vegetables!! I'm holding a sharp-ass knife and he's gonna ask me why I'm pissed off my children were not looked after while I was gone!! Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me??!!! Needless to say, the night did not end well for my loving, yet forgetful-that-he-has children-and-sleeps-all-afternoon-husband.

I don't ask for much. Just a little help with the housework on occasion and if I leave to do something without my kids...that doesn't happen often...that the man that helped me make the kids, could care for them while I am away. * head to desk *

It's Official!!

 Well it's official. My sweet baby boy has been corrupted. The games...the video games, they took my sweet baby. When he wakes up in the morning, he goes straight to the Wii. When he's not eating, he's on the Wii. When he's not sleeping, he's on the Wii. He just turned 7!! I'm just happy he's addicted to a kick ass game...Super Mario Bros!!

I woke up this morning at 7:30. The rest of the house was sound asleep and what was my boy doing, playing Super Mario Brothers! Working on the Castle kicking some bootay!

I am just glad that he isn't playing something overly violent. No COD, or Fallout...I don't even let him play WoW with me. That's my game, lol. It is nice to be able to get him to go outside for a while without having to fight him too much.  

I'm thinking I can blame not only myself for this, but also my husband. We game A LOT!!! Him more than me. My husband can lose himself in WoW. (World of Warcraft) It's amazing how much the husband can immerse himself in that game. There are a few times, I'm pretty sure he sees his life through the eyes of Blizzard.

I love that we are now able to have awesome competitive family game nights though! And believe it or not, my boy has gotten good at kicking butt on the Nintendo! Hmmm...maybe him playing the Wii around the clock isn't a bad thing after all.

I got stuck with Bebe's Kids...

 What in the gay hell is wrong with kids now days?! My son's birthday was this week and he invited some kids in our neighborhood that live down the street from us to his party. I don't mind that my son has neighborhood friends. I don't mind that he has a place to go or that they have a place to go to play safely. Here's my issue, I can't stand when the kids are rude and disrespectful as hell! I was the only adult at this party. My husband had to go to work, and my kids' adopted grandmother had gone home...it was a trying day to say the least.

There is a little boy that is around 5. My son is trying to open his presents and this little boy jumps in and tears open every gift and package. He wouldn't let my boy to have even the smallest little moment to enjoy getting the gifts he received. So not only did he open the gifts, he BROKE them as well!! What the fuck?! My kid had this gift a total of 3 minutes before this little boy broke his toy! No matter what I said to him, he just wouldn't listen. It was driving me crazy.

The little boy had two sisters...one of them was actually behaving and was sweet as be. She can come by anytime :) The other sister though, rude and loud and again, not listening. I had to threaten to beat everybody in the house because this little girl, who is probably around 10 years old, kept trying to stick her finger in my kid's birthday cake. Keep in mind, this is before we even got a chance to sing “Happy Birthday.” She's old enough to know better. She kept trying to take my 7 month old baby to HER house!! Who the hell does that? I just don't know what was going through these kids' heads.

I want to know what the hell their parents do to teach these kids manners? I guess I should think not a damn thing, since their kids didn't have any fucking manners! If you want your child to be a productive member of society, how about teaching them to listen to the adults. Learn to follow directions, don't talk back. Don't try to kidnap babies, and don't stick your little fingers in my God damn cake!! My two year old knows this, why don't your kids know this? Not one of the kids that came over said “Thanks” or “Please” or “May I?” Are we too busy as parents to teach our kids these things now? Are we depending on everyone else to try to teach common courtesy? I can't tell you how frustrated I was when I was serving these kids dinner and all I heard was “I don't like this....” or “I'm not gonna eat that!” Teach your badass children that when they are over at someone else' house, if they are fed, they eat what is offered. Most parents are not short order chefs.  

Why Are You So Stupid?

 So the other day I had the girlfriend of my husband's best friend say with me while our men did whatever it is the menfolk do when they're drinking beer and working on a car. I have met this girl a few times before, so the fact that I nurse should not have been anything new to her, but no...anytime I nursed the baby this girl flipped the fuck out. Let me tell you all about it!

My husband and I decided to grill out that night since his best friend spent all day helping him work on his car. So off (I'll call her R) R and I went to Wal*Mart. We took both the girls with us so that the men wouldn't have to stop working on the cars and could utilize as much daylight as they could. Well the baby was apparently starving halfway through the trip so I latched her on and continued to shop for our dinner while R pushed my eldest daughter in the cart.  I had been walking around the store nursing for 10 minutes before she even noticed I was nursing!!As soon as R realized I was nursing and nursing in public all the stupid shit just started flowing out her mouth...I swear this bitch said “Are you fucking kidding me” diarrhea of the mouth. “I can not believe you would just whip out you tit and start feeding that baby!!” “This is why bottles were invented” “Why didn't you ask me if I was comfortable with you nursing her while we were shopping?” 

I had to remind myself very quickly that I had to be nice to this person because she is the girlfriend of a great friend. That in itself took a lot of will power. The fact that I didn't slap the stupid of her face surprised the mom that was shopping next to me. Her jaw hit the ground when R started off. So after I politely, yet sternly informed her as to why I was nursing my daughter in the middle of Wal*Mart, I had to walk away for a bit...still nursing by the way. We get home in time to put the food on the grill and cook the sides. After the sides were done cooking, the baby became hungry again, so I sit down and start to nurse her again. AGAIN, R asks me “Do you want me to get you a bottle so you can feed her?” I don't understand how a woman who is 22 years old can say something so stupid. I have to wonder if she even heard the words that were coming out of her mouth. But just in case she really is that dense, I want to make something perfectly clear:

I breast feed my child. I feed her when ever and where ever she is hungry. I do not use bottles when I am with her because I don't need to. If you have a problem with me breast feeding my baby, do me a favor and look away. I don't hold a gun to your head and force you to watch me feed her. I don't care if my baby breast feeding makes you uncomfortable, your face makes me uncomfortable and you don't hear me bitching to you about it, do you?

So, now that I have that off my chest, I can stop being nice to people and just squirt them with my boob juice anytime they have something to say about my breast feeding. Don't believe me? Say something... :)