Follow by Email

Saturday, May 5, 2012

They Just Don't Stop!


My kids eat so damn much. It's amazing that I can spend 70 bucks at the grocery store and within the hour it's all gone. I buy enough food for at least 3 days worth of meals, but do they consider that? Of course not.

I can't wait for my kids to go to college and have to provide for themselves. Maybe then, I'll get a few dollars to pay for when they come home to raid my fridge. You know what else? My kids are filthy. Not filthy as in they don't bathe, but in the fact that they can't seem to eat without spilling half of it on themselves. If they go outside, there is a 99.98% chance that grass stains will be involved. I can't tell you how much laundry I do in a week. I am constantly cooking and washing something. I'm that Mom that puts her perfectly clean child in the back seat, drives to destination, goes to take out child, and child is magically covered in chocolate or crumbs that I did not give them.

The husband is just as bad as the kids. He eats like a 15 year old line backer, but then gets heart burn and acid reflux like a 65 year old man. I'm constantly finding grease, food, soda, random stains from God only knows what on his clothes. Gotta love him though. He's only covered in grease from fixing the 115 things that are wrong with my car. He's covered in food from eating my awesome cooking, but the other stuff...all on him. I tell you what though, one of these days very soon...as in next week, most likely on my birthday'...I'm gonna eat all day, dirty up the house, and have someone clean up after me all day. I. Can't. Wait..